A communicative person is open, forward and clear. This means, they say what they are thinking. You don’t have to say “What do you think? How do you feel?”  Authenticity and directness keeps their meaning clear and their diplomacy keeps their message civil.

Over the years, they have learned to optimize their communication so they can enjoy the fruits of life, not having to bat tedious conversations in circles with no conclusion in sight. (Choosing the most appropriate medium of communication for the topic and person whom they are conversing with is a smart idea. For example texting about feelings, probably won’t be translated accurately.) They want to understand and to be understood.

How do you identify him?

  • He knows the 5 Love Languages and wants to speak your languages (or if he doesn’t yet know about them, if he is motivated to learn and practice them – thumbs up. If not, no thanks. This is crucial.)
  • He tells you what he appreciates and doesn’t appreciate discreetly and timely.  He gives you feedback (instead of holding negative thoughts that build resentment.)
  • If you say “I don’t understand” then he uses a business or sports analogy to help you understand.
  • He cares about your feelings and your happiness. His number one priority is to listen and understand your feelings and to ask what he can do to help you feel better, NOT to defend himself as job #1.
  • When you ask him “Do you want to go to Rhonda and Harry’s for dinner with their crew?” He replies, “Not really, I don’t enjoy hearing about everyone’s dog stories and their video game strategies. What I’d prefer, since you are asking is …”
  • He shares his expectations so you can be on the same page.

As I get older, I want right up front communication. “Do I look fat?” Yes, no, or suggest a solution. I ask for feedback because I want it. Because “what gets measured, gets improved.” I track many things. So give me the down and dirty answer and now. Give it to me straight. If I can’t handle the truth, than I shouldn’t be asking for it. I want to maximize my happiness, so tell me what your thoughts now, not later.

With strong communication skills, partners can cut to the chase of any problem and manage it and be in good standing with each other regardless of the results.

Have you seen him or heard from him?


#2 Trait – Communicative– Top qualities I Strive for and Admire

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