What happens when your child doesn't look like you? Listen to Chinese American's pastor and father's experience at the playground.
Jolene 4the generation, Japanese, Chinese, Swedish American talks to 2nd Generation Chinese American Pastor in Seattle
In this 40-minute video, Jolene and her school friend Ming, a Chinese-American pastor, discuss Asian-American norms that influence how to internalize and respond to racism. Ming describes an incident where he experienced intimidation by two white men while at the playground with his young daughter and his reaction to it.
Other issues discussed include:
- The media’s positive impact in getting to the root of why people are demonstrating against racism Asian-American reluctance to speak up and ask for help and the reasons for this
- The tendency in the community to hold the victim of a racist incident responsible, instead of the offender
- Why elderly Asians in Seattle find it difficult to trust young people offering help, and other thought-provoking points. How pride and shame culture plays out in America
- Why Chinese Americans don’t want to speak up about anything negative. Speaking up may be seen as selfish and being a burden.
- Being taught that no one cares what you have to say. If you are treated badly as an Chinese American, its your problem. Suck it up.
- Examples of holding in feelings and repressing them. It’s not that bad compared to what Black people are experiencing.
At 8 minutes, as father or mother, have you been treated like this? Ming tells us about his recent experience as a father of 3 bi-racial children at the playground. Does this happen to White people?
I just absolutely loved this part. Where he asked the aggressors to point out their own children and provide the same proof he had to provide. Of course, they aggressors already knew they had a right to be there and felt no obligation to go through the same amount of time and energy providing their proof.
Ashley Werner
The discussion of Chinese culture was fascinating. “Don’t bring attention to yourself.” and “Don’t ask for help.” I was amazed that even in the pastor’s close-knit community, his congregants would not tell him about events like this that they’d experienced.
Jolene, your story of offering to help the elderly woman in Chinatown was another good reminder that “Asians aren’t all alike.” Thanks for continuing to highlight that.
Veronica Beck
The incident at the park angered me. The two men who asked if he had a child there were out of line. They had no business interrogating him that way. Although her reaction was understandable, I was saddened his daughter’s desire to leave.
Jim Snack